This week, I was given a very realistic option to move to London towards the end of the year. My oldest friend moved there on a whim a year or so ago, found herself very settled in a flat with some lovely flat mates, and walked straight into a job that she’s held down since then with enough money on the side for luxuries/to visit home every other week. She knows how much I love London/want to move down and has been pestering for me to join her for ages, but while visiting on Wednesday I went to see her at work and she was already discussing with her manager the possibility of me getting a job with her, haha! Her manager (and the rest of the team) met me and said that, if I ever wanted a job there, they’d be happy to take me on and that the door is always open. On top of that, we went to hang at her flat and she’s already agreed with her flat mates that, if I were to move down and need a place to stay, I could live with them rent free for a few months, with no need to pay back. I WOULD pay back, if I was to take up this opportunity (pay more than my fair share in the following months until they each got their money back), but it’s just agonising over whether or not I should. They want me to move down in September/October, and I’ve always said ‘the sooner I get to London, the better’, but this opportunity has come so out of the blue that I just don’t feel prepared. Maybe if they’ll still have me in the new year I could move down in January - gives me time to say goodbye to some friends, come to terms with leaving my dad behind (I know that we all have to move on eventually but current family situations make me anxious to just up and go), and on top of that my current training position at work won’t quite be over so I should probably wrap that up before I move on. Grown up decisions are hard!
Got back from Download last night - was gutted to miss Limp Bizkit, but what a bloody weekend that was! Saw so many sick bands, the two highlights (for me personally) being Slipknot and Jimmy Eat World. The barrier broke TWICE during Slipknot, and their stage show was just awesome - really regretting not speaking to them/getting pictures when I met them on Thursday, haha! Jimmy Eat World were everything that I hoped they’d be and more - waited so very long to see them live and it finally happened, during the sunniest part of the day so I was absolutely in my element and going insane! Other highlights included The Gaslight Anthem, Queens Of The Stone Age, Young Guns (obvz), A Day To Remember, Stone Sour (almost every single person in the arena singing along to Through Glass was absolutely magical), A Day To Remember and, funnily enough, Enter Shikari! Never been a fan of Shikari’s music, but have heard so many great things about their live shows so went along to check them out and was absolutely floored. Incredible energy, crowd participation, onstage camaraderie etc; very impressive stuff. Sad to be home now and without the friends I saw over this weekend - and yes, I saw many, many, many of you guys there! Thanks for hanging out - but it feels good to be back in my own bed and planning the next big adventure. Which brings me to my next point…
I kind of have to make a choice between two things that I desperately want: a holiday to Fethiye, Turkey (my favourite place on earth), or a trip to Chicago for Riot Fest (the city I have always dreamt of visiting, and an insane festival featuring some of my all-time favourite bands.) Chicago/Riot Fest works out cheaper and I was working towards going to that anyway, but after being given this ‘choice’ by my dad, if he’s gonna help with me funding either Turkey or Chicago I’d rather let him help out with the cheaper option. Would feel awful if he paid for either of those trips in full; my intention was to pay for both fully myself but money/timewise it’s gonna be tough. If I have to sacrifice one, I’ll give up the holiday, but I’m (hopefully) taking on a new job soon so fingers crossed I’ll earn enough to spend the summer with my family and September in a city I’ve always wanted to see. I feel selfish wanting both, but at the same time these are things that I am working towards and I’ll be giving up a lot on the way - no more gigs until September, no luxuries at all being that all my wage will be put towards these things…I’ll be robbing myself of a social life, essentially, but it’ll be worth it!
The one redeeming factor of today.
I mentioned a couple of days ago that I met a girl while in Ireland; her name is Marion and she’s a good friend of another lovely girl I know (Morgane.) We got along rather famously and it was a pleasure to meet/hang out with her over those few days. Anyway, in that time Marion (and just about everybody) learned of my undying love for Fall Out Boy, and for some unknown reason (which I ultimately am sincerely grateful for), she decided that she wanted to give me her ticket to Fall Out Boy in Paris. I’m so very grateful for this; it’s a lovely gesture to begin with but to say this girl only knew me a few days before making this decision is just…the sweetest thing ever. She’s moving to Australia soon and thus would not be able to use the ticket herself, but could have still sold it on. I keep trying to give her my money, but each time she refuses (‘happiness has no price.’)
So…yeah. The above ticket, I suppose, is mine and shall be on its way to me on Tuesday! Need to figure out some way to pay her back for being so kind.
Why the hell do I have to go home. Spent so long looking forward to this weekend just gone; it’s all over way too soon. Was so hard to say goodbye to the gang; I’m very fortunate to have friends across the world who’re so keen to travel as much as they do, but of course the downside of that is that time spent together is often limited and so when we reach the end of our little holiday-type-adventures, farewells always suck. So bad. Seeing a number of folk at Download and the vast majority again at the end of the month in Manchester (plus even MORE friends who didn’t come along to Ireland); others, however, I’m not gonna see for ages. Particularly gonna miss the beautiful Morgane; trying to figure out a way to go to Paris maybe next month or something as we’ve promised each other a trip to Disneyland, haha.
To those of you who I spent time with over the past week (approx): thank you SO much for hanging out and making this whole trip worthwhile. It’s always so great to see familiar faces and make new friends too; the family just keeps on growing and I definitely feel fortunate to be included in it. Love each of you guys to death.
‘All hands on deck, we live or die together. No matter how far we fall apart, we bleed together’ x
Was panicking that an hour and a half to get through the mammoth Manchester Airport plus security wouldn’t be long enough - took me 20 minutes from getting off the train, to getting to my terminal, to going through security and whatever else before I got to the airport lounge. Very bored. Does anyone else get that impatient that they drown themselves in free perfume samples and consider necking duty-free alcohol?
Anyway. Boarding in about an hour, so very excited to be reunited with so many friends! June is set to be one hell of a month because I’m barely home for any of it - off to Ireland today and am there for the best part of a week, then (hopefully) heading to the Kerrang! Awards, then Download Festival, then everyone from this week’s trip is flying over to Manchester again to celebrate a couple of birthdays/hang out. Really excited about it all.
Hope you all have a fantastic rest of the week! X
Body confidence is one raaaaare thing for me, and I still wanna vom at the sight of my stomach, BUT! I have discovered a pro. The workouts I’ve been doing recently have given me an ass to be proud of, hahaha! Always been jealous of girls with nice arses but I’m trying on the dresses that I ordered and I legit feel as if I could give Beyonce a run for her money. (It’s all talk, obviously - nobody could compete with THAT ass - but I HAVE A BUM NOW, GUYS! It’s what I always wanted…)
Apologies for the crude content of this post (should probably have apologised in advance…? Oh well) but this has made me happy, haha. Realllly need to find out how to target my stomach but today I am giving myself a pat on the back because weightloss is finally happening for me and I don’t feel like quite as much of a potato anymore. Feel happy enough to wear a dress on the weekend, as well, so I can show off my thigh tattoo for like the first time ever ever ever :) only had it a year and a half, ha!
I miss this being my ‘day in the life’, spending hours with my hands pressed up against glass and marveling at the world below. Must travel more.
Just a thought: why is it that so many people (myself definitely included), couldn’t give two shits about what somebody else looks like and will love them regardless, for all their beautiful qualities - their kindness, their intelligence, anything from an extensive list of what makes an individual so wonderful - yet when it comes to ourselves, we struggle to see any good at all. I’m at war with my mind and the girl in the mirror, most of the time. And I know I’m not the only one who feels that way. So many people have the lowest opinions of themselves and it makes me wonder why we’re so accepting of others, but can’t find comfort in our own skin.
This photo is SUCH a mess (there were like 5 different cameras on us/my side of the group were pulling faces and the others weren’t!), but I’m so excited to go back to Ireland and see all of these lovely faces again. Missed my friends and missed my favourite band so very much. One week til I leave for Dublin!!!